Tanishka Nath - Week #12 - The Power of an Apology
One of the most timeless forms of communication; From “my bad” to “my sincerest apologies,” this simple gesture has the power to heal wounds, soothe friendships, rebuild relationships, and keep the world running overall.
An apology is more than just a formal nicety given to please the other person; its real meaning is to account for your actions, and a proper process of apologizing has the ability to clear up miscommunication, prevent further quarrel, and relieve strong emotions that could escalate the situation.
I have personally apologized and been apologized to several times in my own life, and it is definitely an integral component of human nature overall. Humans tend to feel the need to apologize rather than seeing it as a way to get over the fight and move on, which is unnatural and mostly never seems to mend the bigger picture. In accordance with the human feelings of guilt and shame being naturally presented, there is also a need to feel acknowledged and validated, which is why this is so important. Apologies stem from the need to be validated and repair problems, which only intensifies when an apology is not given. It can make the other person feel stuck in the situation, unable to know how to go forward. From business, romantic, and other personal relationships, apologies can be used for other strategies, like regaining trust, exemplifying personal traits, and other ulterior motives.
Beyond this gesture, an apology is absolutely worthless if proper action is not taken after. Apologies stem from the desire to fix your actions, and if that action is not shown, apologies become worthless and can even worsen the situation later on. Apologies that are utilized as a manipulation ploy are deemed completely meaningless, and this can be seen clearly if the gesture is not sincere.
In total, apologies are one of the most powerful tools in the human psyche, and it is necessary to be honest and proceed with a change in actions for that trust to stick.
Understanding Apologies, https://www.swurecord.org/article/understanding-apologies, Accessed 25 February 2025.
Hi Tanishka. I totally agree with your take on apologies and how it is meaningless if not action is taken afterwards. However, whenever I apologize, it is mostly for small things (like you mentioned earlier) only requiring a simple “my bad.” In the past, I used to apologize unnecessarily for reasons so small that it used to be comical. Like you said about avoiding conflict, I just felt like quickly saying an apology in even the smallest of situations was better than not saying anything at all and making that person mad at me. Nowadays, I would like to think that I am different. I do not apologize as much anymore. Part of the reason is because I am sometimes too tired, although that does not stop me from apologizing for something significant enough. But another reason for why I stopped apologizing so much was because, like you said, if there are no actions behind an apology, it is meaningless. That is not to say that I do not want to apologize for things like bumping into someone. It is just that now that I am slowly growing, I am taking the word sorry more seriously. I view it more as an admission of guilt, and I do not like the idea of using it to appease others anymore.
ReplyDeleteWhile I agree with both you and Arnav in that apologies are important, I’m not sure if we see eye-to-eye on what aspects of an apology are important. When we apologize, we usually make our apologies self-centered (e.g. “I’M sorry”). However, it’s not enough to “account for your actions.” It’s equally important to recognize how you made other people feel, the impacts of your actions, and what you can do for others (e.g. “I’m sorry I hurt YOU” or “What can I do to make YOU feel better?”).
ReplyDeleteIt’s also important to recognize what you should have done differently—showing that you understand why your past actions were wrong helps ensure others that you won’t repeat the same mistakes in the future. On that note, it’s also helpful to have a plan for the future—that is, a way to help others know you won’t repeat the same mistakes in the future.
I’m sure everyone agrees that apologies are important—but I think it would be interesting to discuss the different ways in which people apologize.
Hey Tanishka, I believe apologizing is definitely one of the most important things we do as humans. It shows that we care and have the remorse to feel guilty about what we did. Fake apologies definitely do exist and sometimes people apologize too much, so negatives are prevalent, but I think the overall idea of what an apology means to both the person saying it and receiving it is a lot more important than the flaws of how we say it. Apologies can mean understanding, maturity, guilt, a desire to rekindle a relationship, or so many other things that simply could not be done without the sort of vulnerability and understanding that an apology provides.
ReplyDeleteHi Tanishka! I completely agree with your position on the power of an apology. I loved how you described the simple “my bad” as an a miniscule action that can change the direction of existing relationships and soon-to-be friendships. To me, the conviction in which an apology is given means sincerity. When someone bumps into me, their simple “I’m sorry” is enough to let the mistake be completely okay. But the lack of apology conveys almost a condescending, arrogant personality of the opposite person, which shows how apologies can also make or break first impressions as well. For me, personally, I have been trying to work on lessening the amount I apologize. I say “sorry” so mindlessly, even when I have not done anything wrong, which can slowly chip away at confidence levels and self-image. Thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHi Tanishka! I agree that apologies are important in relationships. It's a way of communicating that you understand you have fault in a situation and acknowledging your mistakes. This is really important because from my experience many grudges form when someone does something wrong but is unable to understand what is wrong with what they did, rather than the action themself; with a simple apology and acknowledgement of your mistake, it can be forgiven. I also agree that apologies without taking action to fix the mistake or prevent future repetition is meaningless. Not taking action removes the sincerity from an apology and can even worsen the situation when it seems like a person understands they did something wrong but doesn't care enough to fix it. This blog was very insightful, thanks for sharing!
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